I saw this on Pinterest and I figured since I'm getting back into the reading bandwagon that this would be a good way to broaden my reading horizon and try on different genres that I probably won't tap on myself. So let me get my reading hat on ready and let's get right into it!

Yes, Ze list. The list I make every year but only manage to tick off 2 or 3 from it. I usually write it down on a notebook but I tend to change notebook as the year progresses and I kind of forgotten where I jot it down. So I thought why not put it up here and keep it as a record so I could look back after 365 days. Sounds like a plan?

Generally I don't want to put too much pressure on myself, we know how that turn out last year, yet at the same time I want to challenge myself beyond my comfort zone. And hopefully this time I can say that yes! I have committed to it and that for once in my life I have achieved all the goals I have set out for the year.

1. Drop to 41kg
2. Read 35 books
3. Get engaged
4. Be permanent at my job (2 March 2016)
5. Complete a TIU workout challenge
6. Complete Wreck This Journal
7. Complete 30/40 of 2016 Reading Challenge
8. Complete 50 cents and $5000 a year money saving challenge
9. Complete photo a day challenges

I've been meaning to do this post but not sure if it's necessary. I'm not sure if anyone reads my blog anymore but if no one does well it still serves as a keepsake for me on all things I love and done in the past.

I'm not sure I'm ready to bid 2015 goodbye just yet. 2015 was a roller coaster ride for me. It has it's ups and downs, both a mix of accomplishments and threats but as the year comes to an end, it all seems to turn out well. It scares me what me 2016 would bring but I'm ready to start a new and face new challenges and focus my mind on accomplishing goals I have set out a long time ago.

2015 wasn't the best reading year. I read a total of 18 books compared to 28 books back in 2014. And the quality of books I've read aren't all that great, mostly short poems and biography. Sad times but hey I still manage to read some amazing contemporary and started reading Harry Potter! I'm planning to continue on reading it but for now I feel like getting myself into more contemporary feels. Let's see where 2016 readings will take me but for now let me share with you my top 5 books on 2015 in no particular order.

Since You've Been Gone - Morgan Matson
Paper Towns - John Green
The Girl On The Train - Paula Hawkins
Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone - J.K. Rowling
The Perk's of Being A Wallflower - Stephen Chbosky

Tell me what you're thinking. What thoughts run through your mind as you look at me? I could stare at you all day and that wouldn't be enough. I wonder if you knew how much effect you had on me. How those hazel eyes could strip off the walls I have build, how your voice could easily calm my demons, how your every touch feels like angels are playing with feathers along my skin, chanting me, drawing me into a world filled with uncertainty. You make me weak and I don't know how that is even possible.

I asked you that night, you looking at me while the shadows dance along the traces of your skin, "Why do you make me feel like this? Then you said "because you make me feel the same way."

You told me this is how I should be feeling, not only now but for the rest of it. You reminded me of what love feels like; the passion, the fire, everything… the connection with someone so strong, it doesn't come very often. Yet I hated how you make me feel at times. How ironic isn't it?

It was bad wasn't it; me at your place, champagne in one hand and vodka on the other. I never thought I'll be in this situation again. Perhaps I had too much to drink and I would lie if I say that wasn't my intent. I was just looking at you and it fascinates me how you are in your own comforts, how I got to know bits of you by merely observing every piece you had your heart on.

And as the night fell and I ended up in the cushions of your brokenness, I wonder what thoughts run through your mind as you watch me sleep. I just wonder if those thoughts were every about me.

I'm still trying to grasp how this could happen. How I once thought about it but never see it actually happening. It was a first at least to you but in some ways it is for me too. Tell me why I feel this. Why of all people I felt this way about you. I thought it was just me but I'm surprise you do too.

You are gentle with your kisses, the way it touches my skin, the way your hands explore the insides of me. I felt the time stops right there with you, that subtle look in your eyes taking over me, breaking me.

I still have thoughts of you. Quite often than I should. But I couldn't help it. I just find myself awake and thinking about all of our small encounters like it meant so much more now than it was yesterday.

I wonder if your thoughts were ever the same and for a second that I wonder, I saw your name lit up, then I knew you thought of me too.

You're leaving and it's hard for me to take that in. Just a day that you are gone and I could feel your absence like a part of me wishes you were still around to make sure I was ok. You've been great and I won't forget that you were the one who saw something in me. You believed in me and gave me the chance to start a new. It was a terrifying change but you helped me out through it.

And I won't forget the night we said our goodbyes. The warm and affection of your touch as you warp yourself around me was just too much to take. I wanted it to last longer but I couldn't. I just couldn't.

I wasn't expecting any of this to happen... and I meant that in a good way. I was drawn to you. A depiction of someone I never thought existed; a gentle heart, a kind soul, something rare that I would have thought guys like you cease to exist.

Yet I'm not exactly sure if I'm even saying it right. I'm not good with judgement, at least not anymore. It always appear as though I'm the one dreaming, trapped in this illusion that lies in my head. Needless to say, I needed to feel what I felt that night; a smudgeness of love, a tint of false hope.

photo via anonymous

This is how it's suppose to end isn't it? The sad goodbyes, the whole you needed to see me before you go kind of thing. I couldn't bring myself to it. I'm not good with goodbyes nor am I good with dealing emotions I buried a long time ago. I just didn't want to feel it anymore.

Yet when I saw your message in middle of the night, my heart dropped and I couldn't breathe. I wasn't expecting this. So much had happened over the course of months that I have completely forgotten how I once felt; the joy, the pain and now it's all rushing back in.

Perhaps I was hoping I'd see you again, but not this way, not now, not yet. And I guess now I never will and I'm ok with it.


photo via anonymous

It was a blurry night wasn't it? Some sporadic off-the-mill kind of evening where we're just waiting for something to happen. And when it did, it was two lips ravaging each other after hours and hours of pauses, subtle touches, slow hand held and quiet stares.

I was waiting all night for this to happen. That's what you told me when we finally got the chance to get away from your friends and be on our own at a busy corner in hopes no familiar faces would see us.

Perhaps I felt the same and in that moment I heard nothing but the sound of my body craving for your every touch and every kiss; consuming me, drowning me.

photo by anonymous

I find myself in this stillness, words echoing at the background, hearing words I've heard before but refuse to believe. What was that again? That you'll prove me wrong? That it's not all lies, pain and deceit? I could turn a blind eye and a deaf ear on all those words I've heard before.

But instead you held my hand and just like that, my fingers find themselves meeting yours, filling in every gap like it knows every line and every space that makes up for something I don't even know. Perhaps the stars are playing tricks on me, or perhaps it was my heart.

photo by anonymous

Who: Sandra
What: Goodbye August Party

"Hey, what's wrong?" Those were the words he utter to me as we briefly saw each other at friend's party. He must have read the sadness and dismay on my face. "I don't think I could do this anymore." I said and with just that I left things hanging with no site of going back.

Disclaimer: These are not my personal story. This is just how I interpret the photos.

Photo by sandra

I literally just discovered this song yesterday and it's been on reply on my playlist. Amazing slow song just the way I like it.



photo by the japanese house 

photo by anonymous

One of the very first book I read this year is All the Bright Places by Jennifer Niven. Normally I don't read a lot of young adult books but what draws me to this was its premise. It's story about mental illness and depression, about Violet and Finch who met on the ledge of the school bell tower when one of them supposedly wanted to commit suicide.

It might sound a bit off for some of you but this book really talks about what life is from a young adult's perspective, in which I believe we can all relate to. Needless to say, this book brought tears to anyone to reads it.

"I know life well enough to know you can't count on things staying around or standing still, no matter how much you want them to." - Finch

photo via barnes and noble

Who: Elizabeth Dare
What: Go

Every photo has its story and this is mine.

"I love you". Those were the words he whispered to me. I couldn't help but feel the butterflies in my stomach. Perhaps because I knew I love him too. I feel like the time stopped and I found myself right here with him at this quiet little corner of his apartment. Then I kissed him.

Disclaimer: These are not my personal story. This is just how I interpret the photos.

photo by elizabeth dare

photo via egofm

photo by wocott and her new tribe

I've seen this book quite a number of times but I always give it a miss. Mainly because I thought it's just a dictionary all about love as the title suggest but it turns out there's more to it. It's a story but not a story.

This book makes you feel. The words may not exactly be the simplest but the writer makes it easy to read. He weaves in a story that makes the book all the more intriguing. I couldn't put this one down probably because it allows me to feel a lot of emotions that is very much relatable. If there's one book that I highly recommend for you to read it's definitely this. And surely it's going to be one of my top books of 2015.

photo via pop sugar and djamesauthor

Disclaimer: These are not my personal story. This is just how I interpret the photos.

photo by Théo Gosselin

Photo via sunset in the rearview and juno

As basic as it is, well a brown coat can take on a simpler side for those who are not up to give it an edge. But for those who are, well it doesn't have to be drastic. Take for example these two street style.

Get the look
+ Victoria Beckham Twill Coat
+ New York Yankee Tee
+ The Row Medela Midi Skirt
+ Manolo Blahnik Oxfords

photo via artsy-show and fashion squad

Your words and affection became my medicine and the silence we share and the blankness of your stare made me feel as though all the pain I have in this world doesn't exist.

That there's only you and I and the feeling that maybe life isn't as bad as I thought it is.

Photo by: aweifellos mondbetont

I find myself reading a lot of poetry lately. Perhaps because I find that I could relate to it more compared to a fantasy or contemporary read. It also allows me to connect with the writer in a more in-depth way as  he observes love, relationship and his views of the world.

I'm pretty sure someway, somehow you've already come across Robert M. Drake or more popularly known as r.m. drake. He is one of the few authors who can really describe and capture the essense of human emotion without it being too dreamy or unrealistic.

In this book he uses a lot of earthly metaphors such as the sun, moon, stars, fire and nature to describe a feeling or a relationship. But then as I read along, it kind of gets too repetitive and that's where I start feeling a bit off about it. Nonetheless, I still suggest you grab this book. It's beautifully written and it's a good read when you just want to have a sweet escape.

photo by goodreads

Who: Arturo Oliva Pedroza
What: Axel and Ynes in Paris

Every photo has its story and this is mine.

They decided to take a long walk out in the streets of Paris that night. It was magical much like how every night in the city was like. They wanted to get lost, to feel that the city was theirs to keep, to imagine life beyond what it is and what it could be. Then suddenly out of no where he decides to grab a hold of her, to dance to the eerie silence of the streets with only the sound of motorcycle that resonates the heartbeat of the city. No words have to be spoken, its already been said.

Disclaimer: These are not my personal story. This is just how I interpret the photos.

photo by: arturo olive pedroza

Yndi Ferreira is a young electronic artist behind Dream Koala and his song Odyssey feels like a dream. It makes you want to drift away from everything that's around you and to just have that space where you can call your own.



photo by pigeons and planes

I love this look for running on a quick errand or a casual play on the weekends.

Get the look
+ Hood By Air Logo Compass Print Sweater Shirt
+ Eileen Fisher Organic Slim Ankle Pants
+ White Chuck Taylor Converse

photo by hood by air

Who: Francesc Planes
What: Thinking

Every photo has its story and this is mine.

I see a girl waiting inside the airport, smoking like she could care less whether someone told her off or not. She is waiting for her lover, a man that she met at some random store just right across her street where she live. He went off to some business he has to attend to but promised her the moon and the stars as soon as he comes back. After hours, not even a glimpse of his shadow is in sight.

Disclaimer: These are not my personal story. This is just how I interpret the photos.

photo by francesc planes

If there's one music you need to add to your playlist this week, it's definitely this. Honne are a British duo who knocked me off the moment I heard this song. Warm, sensual and full of groove, this is how I describe their music. It's just pure bliss.



photo via honne

I listen.. to every sound and every word you say. It's as though I'm hearing butterflies and melodies of a song I craved to hear for so long. It feels like I'm connected with you.. for some reason I don't know. You praise me. Telling me how gorgeous I look, how talented I am. Telling me that he should have been there for me, how he should have understood what I'm going through.

You cared for me as though no one ever does. Perhaps this is what I needed… to feel loved... to feel like someone cared during the times I hated myself the most. I could ramble on and on how I hated every part of myself, how this sickness could kill my every being. How I would cry after every purge and every pain that I induced myself because I felt this is what I deserve. Yet after all that you stick with me, telling me how beautiful I am, how you won't stop reminding me of the good things I believe weren't true. If only you were real.

photo by: Stefany Alves

I wasn't so sure how I feel about John Green after reading The Fault In Our Stars. I just find the story way too young and too predictable. I figured since everyone was reading it, I thought I'd give it ago. It turns out, it wasn't my cup of tea but thanks to the movie, John Green relieved himself to me and I figured perhaps I just wasn't reading the book properly.

I grab one of his book again, took my time and surprisingly, I did enjoy it. It reminded me how it was like to be young and be free. How there were less responsibilities back then and how little fears we have aside from just getting a passing grade. But now we tend to hold ourselves back because of fear. Like I can't do this because of this or I can't do that because of this. Whatever the reasons are we just forget how to live and we don't realise that there is more to life than where we are.

In short, we forget how to dream and live in those dreams and this book tells you otherwise. One of my favourite quotes from the book is "Nothing ever happens like you imagine it will… but then again, if you don't imagine, nothing ever happens at all." Yup, I'm a total John Green convert. Now on to the next.

photo via: zahid-c and risarodil

For making me feel like I don't deserve to feel anything. For making me think that everything is okey when it isn't. For making me feel that what I'm going through is stupid. For only caring about yourself and thinking of your own happiness. I held on and put up with it when I knew I could have treated myself better. Perhaps I'm an idiot too, for seeing the good in you.

Get the look:
+ Emerson Fry Midi Wrap Skirt
+ Anne Oversize Vintage Jumper
+ Minimalist Sandal


photo via emerson fry

Serenity


This colour is a soft powdery blue hue that was featured as part of Marchesa’s shoe launch recently reported on by Vogue. Our pick, although slightly less ethereal and dainty compared to the designer’s counterpart, the blue Prosper platforms from Asos are just as stylish. This retro pair would look great with all of your flirty shorts, skirts, and dresses in the spring season ahead, and the color is absolutely gorgeous. Opt for other pieces of pastel clothing to create a sherbert inspired outfit from head to toe.

Rose Quartz


This soft blushing hue is a welcome addition to the top ten colors for spring and will look lovely when chosen for monochrome ensembles or when paired with other neutrals, like white, cream, black, and brown. The pink Jessica Ghilie tie espadrilles from Asos have a ballet flat feel with the natural casualness from the raffia style base and keep the feminine touches alive with the strappy laced up details.

Ice Coffee


If you don’t mind wearing a color that will remind you of delicious lattes all day long, then definitely choose ice coffee for the spring season. This creamy brown hue is a great neutral to pair with pastels, cream, or crisp white. The beautiful taupe Greyson gladiator sandals from Rebecca Minkoff will look darling with cropped skinnies, shorts, skirts, and more this spring.

Peach Echo

Peach is peachy keen for spring and will likely be the new coral of the season. The cheerful hue is a great choice to wear to brunches, weddings, and other daytime fetes. One of our favorite examples is the pink Happiness heeled sandals pictured above from Asos. This gorgeous and glossy pair of shoes will add instant femininity and sweetness to all of your outfits.

With the insurgence of beautiful colors this spring, it’s going to be difficult to choose. Incorporating color into your footwear, though, is a fun and less expected way to inject these popular new hues. We hope that our suggestions above will provide some inspiration and ideas for what to wear when the weather warms up and that you enjoy the hunt for the perfect piece along the way.

As you all know I went to Paris on my own last year but I haven't really shared with you about my experiences in traveling alone. Was it hard? was it scary? Yes and yes to that.

If you're like me who tends to set herself back because of fear then traveling on alone was indeed one of my biggest milestone. It took a lot of courage and perhaps a bottle of vodka to say ok! I am doing this before I set my foot out the door. But enough of rambling and let me list down the things I learned from traveling alone in Paris

• Parisians are actually nice people. The younger ones that is. 
• 
  
• Figuring out directions is like rocket science at least to me. I can never read a map. 
• 
  
• Getting to your destination after minutes or hours of searching is the best feeling in the world. I found Kiko, Sephora and H&M and I was ecstatic
• 
  
• Remember to not use up all your cash before you're actually in the airport. I spend my last euro in Starbucks the night before and I forgot I still need to pay hotel charges. Thankfully they accept visa. 
• 
  
• It's ok to get lost. I took the train and ended up at Gare du Nord station and I told myself seconds before that I don't want to end up in that station again. I got super lost the first time and literally took me 30 minutes to figure my way out. Not kidding.
• 
  
• The sense of freedom is scary yet liberating. You decide where you want to go, eat, shop for hours and there's no need to compromise to anybody. 

If there's one book last year that I didn't expect to enjoy was The Rosie Project. I wasn't so sure whether the buzz was even worth the read but after constantly seeing it and the cover looking so plain adorable, (Yes, I'm one of those girls that judge a book by it's cover. Don't judge me.) I decided to pick it up and give it a go.

True enough I wasn't disappointed, in fact it was quite entertaining. Two different personalities gel into one story was definitely something I haven't read before. Think about it as the Geek and the Beauty but beauty with brains that is. I don't want to give too much away because it's best to go into it without knowing anything. I didn't even read the plot when I first read it. But rest assured that I didn't give this book 5 out of 5 stars for nothing.

photo credit

I'm one of those girls who enjoys a lovely smelling home. Come on, who doesn't right? From my room to the bathroom, I make sure that I have candles to suit whatever my mood is. Lately I'm loving the smell of fresh flowers and desserts so that is what I've been burning. If you're interested to know what my favorite are read along!

Diptyque Baies Parfum Candle - Oh my gosh, someone take me back to Paris please! This scent is exactly how I envision Paris to smell like in Spring. The site describe it as an irresistible freshness of bouquet of roses, sweetened with blackcurrant leaves. This is one of their most popular scent and if you have a $100 to splurge on a candle, go for it.

Ikea Varaktig Scented Block Candle - Isn't she lovely? This does not only look good but also smells goods. It's basically a rose scented candle. Can you see a pattern here? Yes I'm loving the smell of roses lately and it totally matches the theme of my room. I barely burn it though because I'm afraid that Ikea won't stock it up anymore. So just in case, I bought another one for the office. It just proves how much I love it. If you can't find this in your local Ikea, Diptyque Roses Parfum Candle is very similar to it.

Bath and Body Works Raspberry Peach Macaron Candle - Now this is rather unique. I'm not really someone who goes for something fruity but this is different. It is infused with a scent of macaron making it sweeter rather just plain fruity if you know what I mean. I'm not sure of Bath and Body Works still carries this, if not Voluspa Maison Blanc Macaron or Yankee Candle Mango Peach Salsa is similar to it as well.